All About Wishing Well Wording That Won’t Offend

Whether you’re asking for a loan, a pay raise or for guests to contribute to a wishing well at your wedding, requests for money can be difficult, if not downright embarrassing.

That’s why asking guests for cash presents rather than traditional wrapped gifts can be awkward.

However with many couples already living together before marriage and so many who, individually, have their homes already set up, it’s a request that’s becoming more and more common.

Of course, that’s not the only reason couple’s request cash gifts. Some genuinely need the money, others wish to put it towards, say, a honeymoon or a house deposit, perhaps even towards renovations or a bigger present such as a painting, something that constitutes a single, really big wedding present that they really want and will always remember.

And then there are the couples who just prefer cash.

Regardless of the reasons, it can still be uncomfortable asking your guests for presents of money and, as such, couples have come up with a more diplomatic means of doing so, wishing well poems.

Wishing well poems are a gentle way for couples to ask for cash gifts in the hopes of not offending guests. As you’ll see from the examples below, wishing well wording varies in length and diplomacy. Some are gentle and funny, others make their message immediately clear.

Wishing well wording (we hope) won’t offend!
The term ‘wishing well poem’ comes from the fact that many couples provide a wishing well (though now it can be in the form of suitcases, birdcages, even just pretty boxes) into which guests can place their money-filled envelopes before making a wish, usually for the couple. However, they’re also known as Money Trees and Treasure Chests, among other things and, of course, many cultures feature such celebrated wedding traditions as pinning money to the bride’s dress or filling bride’s purse with money during the reception.

The aim of such traditions, which started long before couple’s lived together before marrying, was always to ensure the bride and groom walked way at the end of their big day with a small nest egg to start their married life. Guests who put in what they could afford, if they could afford anything at all.

So, just keep in mind that though you may prefer cash, your guests may not. Perhaps they don’t have the money to give or maybe they may prefer to give you something particularly special that you will treasure as something you received on your wedding day. Either way, if you are going down the wishing well route, be sure to make it clear that cash presents are not mandatory and that you are merely making a request, not demanding guests hand over cold hard cash.

You can either add the poems onto your invitation or, as so many couples do, simply print it out on a notelette or small slip of paper and leave it for guests to decided what they wish to do, but also what they can afford.

Here are some of our favourite wishing well poems:

(1)
“Our two families have come together as one.
We really hope you can join in the fun.
A wishing well we thought would be great,
but only if you wish to participate.
A gift of money is placed in the well,
then make a special wish, but do not tell!
Please do not be offended by our request,
as our day is complete having you as a guest.”

(2)
If you were thinking of giving a gift to help us on our way.
A gift of cash towards our house, would really make our day.
However, if you prefer a gift, feel free to surprise us in your own special way.

(3)
If finding a gift is hard to do,
Perhaps our wishing well is for you.
A gift of money is placed in the well.
Then make a wish… but do not tell.
If, however, a gift you’d prefer to find.
Be assured we will not mind.

(4)

So what do you get
For the Bride and Groom,
Whose house needs things
In every room?

When shopping for a gift,
You needn’t be rash,
As there’s always the option,
To just give cash!

We hope you don’t find,
Our request to be funny
The decision is yours:
To buy a present or give money.

Now you have the choice,
Please do not fuss.
The most important thing of all,
Is that you’re there to celebrate with us!

(5 – from reader Kalysha )

Soon we are to be Mr & Mrs
We don’t need a wedding list of dishes.
Our life together has already begun
We have almost everything under the sun:
Two kettles, two toasters, two microwaves
Though we also have dreams for which to save.
Our dream is to honeymoon in a foreign land
And walk along the beach hand in hand.
If you would like to give us a gift
A contribution towards this would give us a lift.
We like to think of it as our ‘Wishing Well’
Which will be filled with your love, we can tell!
But the most important thing to say
Is that you are there to celebrate our day!
(6 – from reader Adrianna Izabella)
Soon you will hear our wedding bell,
As friends and family wish us well.
Our household thoughts are not brand new,
We have twice the things we need for two.
Since we have our share of dishes and bedding,
We’re having instead a wishing well wedding.
But more important, we ask of you,
Your prayers of love and blessings, too!
If poetry is not your style, you can just word the requests politely, something along the lines of:

The most important thing is to have you with us on our special day. No gifts are needed or expected, however we have been asked what we need or would like and,
if you do wish to give us something, a little cash to spend on our honeymoon would be very much appreciated.

Information About Social media wedding etiquette

Once upon a time, newly engaged couples would announce their big engagement news in the local newspaper. These days, however, most modern brides turn to social media to spread the word. But, before you take to Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat to share your perfectly posed ring selfie, here are a few new etiquette rules you may want to keep in mind.

Tell your nearest and dearest first
Before you announce your engagement to the world on social media tell the people who are closest to you first. For example, your parents, siblings and best friends would probably appreciate being told in person or over the phone, rather than finding out via Facebook and Instagram along with everybody else you know. And, don’t forget your beloved grandparents, who may have no involvement with social media, would definitely appreciate a call or visit to tell them your good news. Once your close family and friends have been informed, then you’ve got the green light to whip out that diamond emoji and #isaidyes hashtag.

Take a moment to let it sink in before you announce the news
You and your partner have just shared an incredibly special moment and it can be nice to let yourselves thoroughly enjoy it before you share it with the world. Take a break from your phones and computer screens to allow yourselves some quality time to enjoy the experience. While it can be tempting to get online straight away and start sharing loved-up selfies, don’t let that prevent you from taking in your special moment, one you’ll, no doubt, want to remember forever.

Share your wedding hashtag
If you plan on having a wedding hashtag it’s best to come up with it before any of your pre-wedding events. This way you can use the hashtag for every occasion such as the engagement, kitchen tea, bridal shower, buck’s and hen’s, and of course the big day. Carefully consider your wedding hashtag and announce it on social media so that your social media savvy guests are aware. If you have also created a Snapchat geofilter then let your guests know. Not only will you have a curated catalogue of images from Day 1 of your wedding preparations, but your guests will enjoy getting involved too.

Check your inbox and notifications
Once you do post the news on social media be prepared for an influx of well wishes and congratulatory responses, all of which you should address. If it’s too difficult to address each response and message personally, then a blanket response thanking everyone for their kind words and wishes may suffice. That said, each of them has cared enough to congratulate you, so it’s always nice to respond, even if it takes you a few days.

Be cautious of your wording
While you may want to tell your family and friends about when and where you’re having your engagement party, bridal shower, Hen’s/Buck’s and wedding, be careful of the way you word the announcement. The last thing you want is your announcement to seem as an open invitation. It can be quite awkward when people start asking you what the dress code is when you weren’t planning on inviting them.

Keep some details private
While you will no doubt want to indulge in the obligatory ‘ring selfie,’ you may want to think twice before sharing particular details about your ring with your social media following. Things like the cost and the number of carats might be OK to share in private with a close friend or family member, but social media is probably not the best avenue to communicate such things.

Apart from possibly being interpreted as a bit of ‘bragging’ by your friends and followers, your fiance’ may not be happy with you sharing such personal information and, there could be safety issues too.

This privacy policy goes for any other wedding planning moments and realizations, such as the cost of your wedding or honeymoon.

You just don’t know who might see your very public post on Instagram about your shiny, new $20,000 engagement bling. So keep safety in mind.
Don’t use social media to vent
While your sister-in-law may be driving you crazy and your bridesmaids may be acting more like divas rather than perfectly supportive ladies-in-waiting, social media is not the place to vent your woes. Often venting on social media can have induce inflammatory responses and start all sorts of things that you just don’t need to be a part of, especially when you’re probably already stressed with your wedding planning.

Try to keep such matters and grievances private and offline.

taking a ring selfie to announce your engagement on social media
Image: Instagram

Don’t overshare
It may be tempting to post every moment of your wedding planning process in detail but, ultimately, how many photos of EVERY. SINGLE. CAKE. FLAVOUR. YOU. TASTED. will your fans be able to handle, even if they are your nearest and dearest.

It’s unlikely they’ll also be interested in a daily countdown photo either, so be judicious in what you post and how often.

It’s fine to share, but try not to overshare. Plus, an element of surprise for your guests can be nice!

Some social media etiquette rules for the guests
Don’t jump the gun. You know your sibling, best friend or work colleague is about to announce their engagement. You are not the town crier. Let the happy couple be the first to broadcast the news. Putting their information on social media before they announce it is a great way to steal somebody’s thunder.
Don’t get in the way of the official wedding photographer and videographer on the day. While you may be trying to get the perfect photo to post on Instagram or you’re filming the ceremony for your Snapchat story, it’s best to make sure you don’t get in the way of the paid professional’s as you could hinder what content they capture.
Don’t post photos before the bride has even reached the altar. While you may be excited to start sharing your photos in real time, remember that the couple may want to release images of their wedding first. It’s best to ask them ahead of the wedding so they can tell you if they would be happy with you posting images during the ceremony.
Use a private message for a private matter. If you have a query, complaint or question for the bride and/or groom, don’t ask or tell them on social media. Ask them privately.

Some Fun Ways to Tell The World You’re Engaged

The big question has been popped, you’ve got a sparkly new rock on your finger and now it’s time to tell the world. Here are 15 ways to do it that range from traditional to seriously social and modern:

Go with tradition
Tell the world you’re engaged with a traditional couple’s engagement photo. Over the years, you’ve probably seen people announce their big news this way and all it takes is snapping a great shot of you and your new fiance and sending it out on social media – or having it printed and send by snail mail. If you want truly memorable shots, rather than a happy snap taken on your phone, hire a professional wedding photographer who can put togther an engagement shoot that reflects who you both are.

Image: agentykyriss via Instagram
Image: agentykyriss via Instagram

Get a shot of the rock
Another popular way to announce your engagement is to take a simple shot of both your hands with the ring in focus like the image above or to shoot a close-up photo of the ring, with you and your fiance out of focus and in the background.

Surprise (cocktail) party
Plan a happy hour get together with all of your friends and, once everyone arrives, announce the news in person. Getting to see all of their faces will be priceless.

Show off your love
If you and your new fiance have been writing one another love letters (or, should that be emails and texts), grab them (or printouts and screenshots), read them out aloud to each other and snap pictures of your new fiance’s reaction as you do it.

Sneak attack
This one has to be planned ahead of time, so gents (and ladies), before you propose, organise for a friend or, better yet, a professional photographer to be nearby to capture the first reaction shot as she says yes.

Be crazy creative
Whether you search for ideas on our Inspiration Boards or Pinterest, or you’re an uber creative couple that loves to try new things when it comes to designs and colours, do your thing, whatever that may be, snap a photo and share away. The photo above may be a little too risque for some couples, but it’s about creating something fun that reflects your relationship.

Or, go for a little pun-tastic fun
One of the few times in life you’ll get away with being seriously corny is when you’re engaged. Consider creating a great pun surrounding your announcement. So, for example, if you get engaged in Autumn, find yourself an apple tree and hold up a hand-written sign that says, “I pick you!” #CornyButCute

Engagement ring beach proposal
Add some sand
If you live near the beach or are taking a trip together where there’ll be sand, make your announcement there. Create the words “I said yes!” out of sand or bits and pieces you find on the shore, such as shells and driftwood.

Create a heart-felt message
Whether you use overlapped thumb prints or hands to create a heart, your love will shine through as will your message if you include the ring in your picture or words such as ‘we’re engaged!’

Grab a coffee – or champagne!
Grab your coffee mugs or champagne flutes and adorn them with the words Mr. and Mrs. That’ll send a signal to anyone seeing it… loud and clear!

Photoshop – engagement photos
Image: karidee00 via Instagram

Get your Photoshop skills on
If you’re handy with Adobe’s image manipulation software, do something fun such as creating an iconic movie poster that stars you and your new fiance’s images. If that’s a little too complicated, something like the image above, which is fun, but relatively simple will do just as well.

Shoot a video
Even if it’s just a quick 15-second Instagram video or something fun on SnapChat, create a video announcement. For friends and family who may not see the video on Insta or SnapChat, you can always download it and put it up on a wedding website or just email them the video directly.

‘I do’ (love engagement ring shoots)
These simple, wooden tiles create such a beautiful dichotomy from your gorgeous, sparkly ring. Whatever message you wish to spell out, make sure it include one “O” and replace that with the ring. ‘I do’ works, too.

Paint the town red (or whatever colour you like)
Grab some chalk and fill the ground with colorful messages of love and endearments. Stand behind your drawing and have a friend capture the image. If you don’t want to be quite so forthright in your declarations of love, you could go with the old he-asked-and-she-said-yes wording.

Some Awesome Hashtags Used By Real Couples

There are those couples that ban mobile phones on their wedding day, and those that fully embrace the digital age by creating wedding hashtags for guests to upload their happy snaps to Twitter and Instagram for the rest of the party to enjoy.

Regardless of your stance on social media and its role in documenting wedding celebrations, there’s no denying the creativity and comedy packed into these 15 awesome hashtags used by real couples:

1. #ForeverYounge
Reddit contributor AdrianLou told the social media site of his friends who wed to share the surname ‘Younge’, which naturally became a play on the phrase, ‘forever young’. While we’re not privy to their wedding playlist, we can only imagine it involved Bob Dylan’s classic ’80s hit, Forever Young and Youth Group’s 2014 hit of the very same name.

2. #ForeverGreen2015
Huffington Post guest contributor Kristen Ley joined forces with finance Josh Green to create a wedding hashtag that not only played on a timeless idiom, but also rhymed, as well as incorporated the couple’s new surname AND wedding year… That’s one wholesome hashtag!

3. #WedLongAndProsper
Another Reddit punter (and likely Star Trek enthusiast) tells of their somewhat lengthy wedding hashtag, foretelling of a long and financially fruitful union.

4. #EyebrowsAndVows
One online forum contributor revealed a friend of a friend’s hairy hashtag, in line with the bride’s renowned ‘ridiculously huge eyebrows’.

5. #OnCloudGavin
Crazy Together couple bloggers Maria and Rob Gavin used an online hashtag generator in an attempt to find their special wedding hashtag. Other combinations included #FinallyGavin, #HappilyEverGavins, #RobAndMariaSittinginaTree, #HereComeTheGavins, #HappyToBeaGavin, #GavinsEts2015 and #OhHappyGavins.

6. #SheldonSquared
One debatably lucky couple already shared the same surname before tying the knot. Reddit reveals that instead of changing her name (to the same name), the running joke was that she would add a squared2 symbol to her surname. Instead, the couple created a fitting wedding hashtag to symbolise their double-dealt surname.

7. #Swartzember
One wedding-goer tells of their friends’ September nuptials, resulting in a memorable wedding hashtag, and an unforgettable anniversary month… And Mr Swartz stayed happily in the good books forever after!

8. #BakersInTheBarn
If you were the Bakers – getting married in a barn – how could you resist the alliteration of a little B-on-B? And that’s exactly what one couple did, according to their Facebook friend in an online forum.

9. #WeStillComing
An accidental wedding hashtag came into being when a bride-to-be thought she was sending a wedding photoshoot invite to friends. It turns out she had a wrong number, but that didn’t stop the recipients from RSVP’ing – and actually showing up.

“You have the wrong number but me and my boys will be there,” the recipient responded to the bride’s accidental invitation.

“Oh sorry! Not an invite to strangers,” the bride replied, to which the wannabe-partygoers wrote, “We still coming.”

Needless to say the hashtag trended on Twitter, later sparking rumours of the incident’s authenticity. Either way, it turned out to be one awesome wedding hashtag, with all-inclusive photo shoot proof.

10. #ToHaveAndToHolton
Casey and Ross Holton married in the small coastal Californian resort destination Pebble Beach in 2014 with an ever-appropriate hashtag drawing on Ross’ surname and the 1900 best selling novel, ‘To Have and to Hold’, by American author Mary Johnston.

11. #BrokenBride
Christie Woolf Flaherty will forever be known as the bride to make light of a bad situation when she revealed to SHAPE Magazine that she broke her arm exactly a week before her wedding during a surprise bridal shower, causing her to have surgery that resulted in a fashionably white wedding splint.

12. #WrightStateOfMind
When Shaina Friedman was planning to become Shaina Wright, she told SHAPE Magazine that her and fiancé Zak wanted all their wedding guests to enjoy their day as much as them, which required everybody being in the ‘Wright state of mind’ – focusing on laughter, love and joy; the perfect wedding potion!

13. #LetsGetRauchy
At first glance it may look raunchy, but Kelly Butler and now husband Ryan Rauch (pronounced ‘wow’), cleared up any confusion as to the pronunciation of their new shared surname when they invited wedding guests to get rowdy – in a round about way – with their provocative wedding hashtag, #LetsGetRauchy.

14. #Promdate2Lifemate
Kaylene Meredith told SHAPE Magazine how she and her partner attended prom together and began dating a month later, so when their wedding day finally arrived, they used the ever appropriate hashtag, #Promdate2Lifemate.
15. # OneHaleOfaWedding
Kayla Pippin and husband Dustin Hale of Manchester in Georgia had one ‘hale’ of a wedding when they tied the knot in 2014.

Tips For Make Garden wedding

The idea of a garden wedding is very romantic in principle; reciting your vows amid the natural beauty of picturesque trees and vibrant flowers. But how can you be sure your chosen venue will be looking its best on the big day? Scorched leaves and drooping blooms could turn your dream wedding into a nightmare.

Here are five garden wedding tips to get the best out of your garden venue:

Consider your date carefully

If you have your heart set on getting married at a particular garden venue, find out when the plants and flowers are likely to be at their best and set your date accordingly. Ask to see photos of the various seasons and try to talk to one of the gardeners who will know the seasonality of every plant in the place.

If you are getting married in your own garden, or that of your parents, you probably have time to do a little replanting. If you have set a date, talk to a professional at your local garden centre to see which plants and flowers you should plant to have the best display on the day.

Supplement your garden’s natural beauty

Even the most experienced gardener can’t be sure that a certain garden will be looking its best on a particular Saturday in eighteen months time. Gardens are at the mercy of the seasons, and a little unseasonable weather can delay or accelerate the annual progress of a garden by several weeks.

To be sure your garden venue still looks wonderful be sure to augment it with arrangements of cut flowers brought in from elsewhere, and some potted plants and shrubs. Arrange your cut flowers in rustic containers such as old fashioned watering cans and glass jugs, and hire potted plants from a garden centre.

Gardens can be decorated too

Just because your garden venue looks naturally beautiful, there’s no reason you can’t add some extra decorations to make it look even more special. Most couples choose to add an archway or gazebo as a focal point for the ceremony, but you could also consider small decorations for the trees such as ribbon bows or colourful fabric butterflies.

Add light to your venue

If you are having an evening event check out the lighting in the garden. You want your guests to be able to see what they’re doing, but you don’t want them dazzled by industrial flood lights. Candle lanterns hung in the trees, or on small posts in the ground can give a cosy glow, as can white or coloured fairy lights. Look for citronella candles if you want to avoid the lights attracting unwanted guests of the insect variety.

Pay attention to your flower arrangements

If you are having an outdoor summer wedding your wedding flowers, such your bouquets headdresses and table centres, may wilt quicker than usual in the hot sun, even if you get them from a florist rather than the garden itself. Have flower arrangements made in oasis that is regularly watered during the day or place flowers in simple vases of water. Keep bouquets and headpieces out of the sun until the last possible moment, and make sure there is somewhere shady you can put them in water at various times during the day.